Thursday, January 9, 2014

5 Ways to Keep Your Cool

I try hard not to yell at my kids. I truly do, but you know as well as I do that it's HARD. I had a friend look at me as I was talking to one of my children and ask "They listen when you just talk like that?" Well yes, i answered, but it does take some time for your kids to get used to you "just talking" if they are accustomed to mom yelling most of the time. Satan knows my weaknesses he knows just when to let things happen and that when it does I'm going to lose my cool and blow up at one or all of my kids.

It's easy to let the little things or annoyances of your day to day life get to you and turn your attitude sour very quickly. I've noticed it myself with my own attitude and the way I deal with my family. Unnecessary messes, when things aren't quite going my way or hearing complaints are just a few examples. I want to share a few things that help me to get my attitude back in check. That is, where God wants it to be. Focused on Him, showing a loving, kind, patient mother and wife. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 31: 26 these things that a wife and mother should be.

26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

If you're like me, you're not speaking with wisdom or faithful instruction when angry, frustrated, upset or any combination of those things. It's not easy to do and I struggle with it daily. I have to ask God to help me not yell at my children. I know that's not how he wants me to treat them.

Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Here are 5 things that I've found that help me. 

1. Take a Deep Breath
For some reason this just helps. It's not always easy when you're in the "heat of the moment" but it does help to calm you down and deal with things properly.

2. Time Out
Yes, even mommy needs a time out every now and then! Walk away, go outside, to your bedroom or another place and just cool your jets so to speak. If the kiddos come following (and chances are they will) just explain that "Mommy just needs a minute to calm down."  While you're there do #3.

3. Pray
Our heavenly Father is right there to help when we ask for it! Again, easier said than done but He will help if you ask for the patience and self control you need.

1Thessalonians  5:17-18
Pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

4. Listen to Worship Music
This is one that can switch my attitude in a second! I put on worship music either on my phone, laptop for find a station on the radio and start singing away! By doing so, I'm getting the attention and my thoughts off of me and my current situation and refocused on God. I shared several of my favorite songs last October as part of my 31 Days of Encouragement.

1Chronicles 16:9 Sing to him, sing praise to him; tell of all his wonderful acts.

5. Read your Bible
Send the kids off to play in their rooms or watch a movie and just take a few minutes to spend some time in God's word. Just like the music you are no longer worried about what's going on around you and instead are thinking about what you are reading.

James 1:8 Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.

I'm a work in progress with this. I struggle with it daily but it has gotten a LOT better over the years of practicing at it. I still have a long way to go but I'm noticing things that help me! That's a step in the right direction and I hope that this post encourages you. You're not alone in your struggle with how you speak to your children or react to them when things go awry but there are things we can do to help us along the way!

What are some of your tips for keeping your cool? 


  1. Now that my kids are older I rarely have to yell at them. (Thank the good Lord, we don't have many struggles with them). However, I appreciate these tips and will be putting some of them to use when I start to feel myself angry towards another person.

  2. Very encouraging post. My children are young (5 and under) and still learning to "listen and obey". Thanks for these tips. =)

    (To commenter Terra: Our little girl's name is Terra. Beautiful name! Since it means "earth", it reminds me that "the earth is the Lord's". =) )


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